The ring and the watch I actually didn't get today but chose while I was on Holiday in Turkey. The watch is a Rado and is well cool with the face sort of blending into the strap. Okay technically it's not a Rado but a cheap knock-off but according to the very honest seeming man in the shop it's impossible to distinguish between this and the genuine article. He wouldn't lie to me right?
The ring I also got from a dodgy Turkish shop in order to replace the ring I lost in Bulgaria. I forgot to mention here that it happened what with all my chubby girl antics but it was quite a big deal at the time; I'd inherited it from my Dad and it had considerable sentimental value. When it came off in the sea I went a bit mental and snorkled around looking for it for probably over an hour while Rich and Goof looked slightly concerned. I had nightmares about it for weeks after too.
Anyway I got a cool new one which I consider a kind of spiritual successor. It's made of stainless steel with Onyx stones in it and I think it's probably actually slicker really. It just feels good to be wearing one again anyway as I kind of missed the feeling of having one there. Also when I'm very drunk I sometimes talk to it and it gives me advice...
Probably shouldn't have mentioned that...
Pete, Stinky and the rest of the family all also bought expensive rings and things as souvenirs (it wasn't their birthdays!) which is stressful as anything. All the shop keepers try to force you to buy their stuff and when they try to leave they assume you're just bluffing or haggling. In actual fact you just don't have any need for a dog made out of shells.
They all also use the same phrases everywhere you go - mostly quotes from Delboy in Only Fools and Horses. It seems like he's somehow become the ambassador for all of England (probably not a good thing). They also seem to be missing the point rather; not realising that they're meant to be trying to prove that they're not like Delboy as opposed to vice versa.
The shopping was made even more awkward for me however when the young guy in one jewelers seemed to take rather a liking to me. I was chatting to be polite but I think he mistook my English politeness for genuine interest so he suggested we go to a club. I made some lame excuse after which he insisted I give him my number.
I was now beginning to worry he might be gay so I gave him the number for my old phone, only for him to try and ring it and find it didn't work. I explained it was in the safety deposit box (a blatant lie) and so he gave me his.
Only then we went back there later so I actually had to hide round the corner for half an hour while my sisters tried on rings. Ridiculous.
Other than shopping we spent the last few days relaxing. On the last day though we did so on a beer cruise which was pretty awesome entailing lying in the sun, drinking and stopping for the occasional swim. It wasn't as restful for me though as it could have been as I decided to spend my time showing off climbing the boat and doing backflips from the diving bit (backflips/faceplants actually). I then went swimming with Pete to a distant cave where I found a diving weight and about 50 rocks that I decided I just had to have. By the time I'd swum the hundred or so metres back I was completely exhausted, burned and terrified (I thought I was going to get eaten).
Then at the airport it turned out I couldn't take the weight anyway as they were charging £8 per kilo over the limit. Randomly the rep actually asked if he could keep it so it went to a good home. I realised the irony when I asked what on Earth he'd want with it...
I left my big shiny rock in the case though, even though it's forbidden to take them out of Turkey and apparently a 'big problem' (I didn't notice any particular lack of rocks while I was out there but whatever). My Mum and Pete were trying hard to convince me to leave it but being a 'know it all' I convinced them there wouldn't be a problem and stubbornly left it there - only to find minutes later that we had to x-ray each of the cases.
Obviously the giant rock was rather obvious on the xray machine and I was rather sternly told to get it out. The security guard then held it, looked at me like I was a nutter, and went 'Oh go on then! Have a great flight!'. It was a bit weird actually (Adam magic). I think he might be the soundest airport security guard on Earth.
Since being back I mostly rested - all that holidaying is tiring. The other day I went round Goof's to watch Kickboxer and shave his head (?) but left after 8 hours having done neither opting instead to talk like old women for the entire time (plus the clippers were duff). At midnight we had a mini birthday party with cake I'd been given by my neighbour-across-the-road Margerie and a can of beer (and cup of tea). That's how I saw in my man-hood.
Yesterday I also went for a nice meal with family at the Tatnam Tandoori and had a splendid Keema Massala (though I wished I'd had a Keema Dhansak) and I will be partying like it's my birthday over the next two days so it's all good.
Also planned for the near future is the possible return of some facial hair. This time just a moustache though. I realise now that the beard didn't really work and looked like an identi-fit one, but I think this could be better. Some people also described my previous attempt as making me look like an 80s porn star. Personally I think that was a bit generous and that I was more likely a porn extra - perhaps the guy who stands in the corner wanking.
Anyway, I'm going to try this, despite some scepticism (starting after my birthday celebrations though).
It's good to be back and I have a fun month planned before my return to Uni on Sept 8, so roll on the good times!



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